(no subject)

[clumsy_auror]

The contractions are regular, now. Regular, and steady, and growing stronger. She keeps giving Bernard feeble smiles, as she paces the floor, trying to stay limber and move around while she still can.

One imagines the kettle will be going fairly constantly for the people ensconced in the living room.

Comments

[mnt_raph]

Not willin'ly, no. It's kinda a magic accident that I'm like this at all. Learned the hard way to never piss off a witch.

*Beat.*

Got better.

[platonicowgirl.livejournal.com]

"Not Nymphadora, I hope."

Kathleen winces as an angry, raised voice suddenly erupts from the bedroom.

Looks like Bernard's being an asshole again.

[mnt_raph]

*Raph doesn't exactly hide behind Kathleen, because big tough guys don't hide behind moms. Um...ever.*

Nah, not even when I turned her green on accident.

[platonicowgirl.livejournal.com]

"You didn't."

[mnt_raph]

Not on purpose! I was aimin' for Bernard!

[platonicowgirl.livejournal.com]

And now she gives him a Look.

"And what did he do to deserve that?"

[mnt_raph]

*Raph might just take a step back at that Look.*

He Started it.

[platonicowgirl.livejournal.com]

"Oh, did he? What was it that he started?"

She might be mad.

Or she might be teasing him.

The world may never know. The woman could have made a fortune at poker.

[mnt_raph]

*Yeah, that's another great big step backwards.*

Prank war. Bastard put shit in my shampoo. Worse than frickin' sheddin' season. AN' he put snappin' chemical crap on my floor.

[platonicowgirl.livejournal.com]

And Kathleen has to bite the insides of her cheeks not to bust out laughing.

"Well. That sounds like him. You should know better than to get into a prank war with a chemist."

[mnt_raph]

Yeah, well that's why he got green dye in his shower, an' a sound alarm in his bedroom. Boy had to be taught not to mess with ninja.

*Raph grumbles something about how bernard is lucky he didn't tape mike to the ceiling...*

[platonicowgirl.livejournal.com]

"Oh, like Bruce Lee?"

The green dye is forgotten.

[mnt_raph]

A little, yeah. Our school ain't quite as flashy, an' there's more stealth.

[platonicowgirl.livejournal.com]

"Wow." She's gaping a little. "And, do you work for Bernard, or are you just a patron?"

[mnt_raph]

Little o' both really, but he pays me to be a bouncer.

*While he is wearing the fingerless gloves, he's not wearing the Babysitter shirt. Damn the luck.*

[platonicowgirl.livejournal.com]

"Smart of him," Kathleen quips.

Another sound from the bedroom, and she pales, a bit.

"I wish to Christ this was over with."

[mnt_raph]

how...uh...how long's this suppos'd to take?

*Guess who's green again?"

[platonicowgirl.livejournal.com]

"She's been in labor since early this evening."

It's about 5:00am now.

[mnt_raph]

holy fuck....is that...you know...like...normal?

*See, the plan was to sneak in with the MilkyTea and leave it on the kitchen counter. No harm. No foul. Hooo boy.*

[platonicowgirl.livejournal.com]

"...I think so, yes. But she's at the end of it, so you might as well stay and meet him."

She's practically bouncing at the idea, herself.

[mnt_raph]

but that means he'll be fresh from...ohgod

*Raph, having finished the beer, cracks open the Thermos and takes a drink. He grimaces as he does so.*

[platonicowgirl.livejournal.com]

"...They'll clean him off, you know. Everything'll be... less, um. Squidgy. When we go in."

Ideally. She might pop her head in and convince them to leave some blood lying around, just for Raph's benefit.

[mnt_raph]

*She is an evil and vicious woman who must be stopped. Besides, it's not so much the blood that'll bother him, but rather the very idea of how the baby came to be there. It's only been a year since he's found himself comfortable with...well...you know...stuff.*

clean or not, i'll know

[platonicowgirl.livejournal.com]

Squinting confusedly, Kathleen takes another drink.

"Are you uncomfortable with women, Raph? Oh, and do you need another drink?"

[mnt_raph]

no an' yes.
...
In that order.